thought i'd post the link for the koh phi phi photos

I am a rebel.  I have always been a rebel.  And so, naturally, I have always scoffed at the ambitions of conservative society.  We are taught as children that our ultimate goal should be to find an appropriate partner, to have children (possibly giving up our career in the process) and to aim for ownership of a home, typically in the suburbs with a little picket fence.  And, of course, if we buy into this dream, then the day our house deal comes through is going to be one of the most exciting days of our lives.  The same sense of self-congratulation that comes with having children of our own, as though it were an amazing feat, as though no-one had ever done it before.  What a ridiculously mundane, mediocre dream it is.  Why, how could one want to be the same as everybody else?

Which is why I was taken by surprise tonight on the sky train, when I found myself looking at an ad with some young nuclear family, woman smilingly clutching baby, yuppie man in polo shirt high-fiving young son, standing in the garden of their brand-new house, proud owners who had realized their ultimate nuclear ambition and were jumping for joy, and, just for a moment, I found myself being dragged into their world, a fleeting moment of envy as I considered my own solitary existence in my one-room apartment, and I found myself wondering if one day I might have my own garden to jump up and down in, my own family member to high five in self-congratulatory fashion.  And then it hit me: I am becoming like everyone else – those conservative ambitions must have been creeping into my subconscious in the night.  How could I let that happen?  When, where and how did I start to change?  Or does it merely come down to a momentary lapse of reason?

Most people, when they arrive in thailand, are getting into holiday mode, enjoying the warm sunshine, sitting in a tuktuk wondering if they're getting ripped off, studying their lonely planet and figuring out which islands they're headed for. 

Then there's idiots like me who get into bangkok and immediately start worrying about finishing and submitting their assignment, doing the laundry, removing rotting food from the fridge, looking at coursebooks (help! students are back on monday!) and eventually remembering that it's hours and hours past midnight and it's probably a good idea to lie down.

It's times like these that I need to remind myself of the reason I moved here in the first place.

RELAAAAAAC!

i'm a little bit scared of my boss, as you might have guessed.  it seems like whenever i see her, it's because i'm in trouble.  so i do try to stay out of her way as much as possible.  that's the kind of great relationship we have.

she comes into my classroom once in a blue moon.  it's been twice so far this year, in fact. 

the first time, i was busy teaching my kids the word 'comfortable'.  of course, to fully get the meaning of this you need to demonstrate it.  first you get them to sit on a hard floor and wiggle about a bit and make pained faces.  then you get them back in their chairs, feet up on the desks, arms behind heads like so, (and remember, feet are offensive in this country)

and of course when you've got all eighteen of your students doing this, that's going to be the exact moment your boss walks into your classroom.

so I was teaching my favourite class this week, my beautifully behaved, clever, funny kids, the sort that make my job a joy instead of a drag.  and they were busy all lesson doing their intelligent, well-behaved thing.  towards the end of the lesson, we did a listening exercise - play a song, fill in the gaps on your worksheet.  completed easily, no fuss.  still five minutes left til the end of class.

'Teacher Dorla, play song again!  Please!'

'Alright.  You can sing along if you want.  Have a dance.'

'Yay!'

And so of course they're all up immediately, jumping about like crazy chickens, roaring like lions, wriggling on the floor...

this is one of those moments where you think, if the boss were to walk in now... and, guess...  what ... happened.... next....